Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
After I asked for my 6th Gin & Tonic, the look on the flight attendant's face started to make me feel bad about myself.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
i just turned on my printer and found 10 pounds of german chocolate inside. i think i found where you hid your candy last night
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