I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
yeah so this exboyfriend of yours reckons you're still together and he punched me in the face cos i slept with you last week. you might wanna have a word with him or at a minimum change your facebook status.
so let's talk penis.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Doubtful. That seems irresponsible. The 4th will kill you if you stopped drinking until then. Let's think logically.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
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