This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
She was sitting there stuffing her face rubbing my back with a dorito cheese filled hand while eating something else with the other hand as I was crying.
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in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
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He's German, so by default he gets to fuck me.
And we had three hours of crazy sex then his roommate ate pizza off me while I was sleeping.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
Well I hate to admit it but at this point I can successfully say i have been pee'd on by both of my roommates.
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
He kept saying "Ayyyyyyy" during foreplay... during sex.... during everything! It felt like I was having sex with friggin Fonzie from Happy Days!
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