The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
I had a disgustingly explicit dream last night involving myself and lil wayne.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Dating Detox Day 5: had to go out and buy new batteries. this may be harder than I thought
My dick was almost in plain McDonald's sight
Walking into the first day of college is like walking into a meat market. A meat market of sex.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
My booty call just moved 2 min from my house
This has pregnancy written all over it
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
The batteries in my vibrator died before I could finish. Which is a lot like my sex life lately......
Randomize
