glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
today is like waiting for pizza day in elementary school, but with sex added
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
This is how I ended up being the slutty friend isn't it?
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We had to go to his parents last night for dinner & ended up having a quickie in the bathroom while everyone else was outside smoking.. This is why we have a successful marriage.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
In other news, I just burned my penis
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
Randomize