i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
hes a good boy he deserves a good blow
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
To tired for the bar. Came home and drank wine out of the bottle. Kind of don't want to know what that says about my life.
Of course the first guy who sees my nipple piercings is a Catholic from Nebraska who won't do anything but dry hump me.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize
