i hope S**** or M***** or someone took note of the fact that i was drinking popov like water and could no longer form sentences. i mean, dont get me wrong i had been thinking about boning R*** long before my sobriety left the picture but the number of reasons not to, outweighed the temptation and without sir robert burnett as R***'s wingman, it would have never happened
Did we have sex?
No you put the condom on then passed out on the bed so I left
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
Life's too short to consider the larger psychological underpinnings of my lust.
It's too hard to jack off and hold an ipad at the same time
I honestly wish you had parked the car in the terminal garage and fucked me in the backseat but I guess I should be more forward
Let's drink?
Just because it's bacon vodka doesn't mean it's for breakfast.
You insisted on going outside so you could "breathe real air".
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Like if it it's practical for your sexual health I'm allergic to it AKA REGULAR CONDOMS
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
