we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
is asking a girl out on a date while in another girls bed in poor taste?
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
He went all Bachlorette on me.. "I just want to guard and protect your heart" bullshit
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
There is a positive side to a sinus infection. Exclusively cowgirl sex. I've convinced her I'd pass out if I had to do the work.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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