So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
why im i the only drunk person in the library?
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
On that note if you see a hobo smiling with a pack of cigarettes and an AMP energy drink, that was my good deed for the day
no dude free pina colada`s taste like what I would expect my penis to taste like except gay-er.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
Dude he took a shit in the lake and it just floated around and lingered near our boat for 2 hours. I fucking hate that kid
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
Can I get high for this class every tuesday? Its like a multi-sensory carnival acid trip.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
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