Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
woke up this morning with a fat chick but she went downstairs and made pancakes without saying a word.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
My arms are sore from holding up pukeahontas for so long
Ed's in which sucks about a thousand cocks... But thats 1800 less than working with Alex so it's gonna be a good day
Also his beard was very delicious looking. I wanted to touch it so bad, but I held back.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I just recorded myself pooping, then uploaded to google drive, then connected to my pc through teamviewer then downloaded it, then played it to the living room while still pooping. God I love the internet.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
sorry about your sharpie. alex wanted to shave the left side of his body so he had me draw a line over him with a ruler
Randomize
