he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
i woke up at 5 am and found myself wrapped in christmas lights that were plugged into the wall.
just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
she insisted i was the anonymous guy on formspring that kept asking to bang her
Clearly I went along with it
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
You spilt a drink on my couch, then used my dog to mop it up... you called her a mop dog, repeatedly
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