once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
Dude I'm 99% sure I'm witnessing an e-harmony date at panera, prob late 40's, this is better than the movies.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
He held me the entire night. Not endearing kind of way. Like kidnapping or held hostage kind of way.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
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