She has 260 profile pics. In 260 she's ugly and in 255, she's making the peace sign with her hands...
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
if you didn' use the plastic sword on the cop. maybe this wouldn't have happened.
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
He got hit with a horseshoe, set on fire, fell out of a tree, and puked all over the side of his car, all before midnight. Everclear.
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
