I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
Now he's trying to use the tornado warnings as an excuse to get head. Yeah, b/c THAT'S the last taste I want in my mouth b4 I die...
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
Liquid roulette time! Black Mystery Cups are filled with either ipecac, whiskey, or NyQuil. Let's have fun
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
If there's anything my liberal arts education has taught me, it's belligerence.
Maybe not Elvis quality pharmaceuticals...But some good stuff
I walked out ot my car in the morning thinking there was a sandwich I left there from yesterday. Then later that day I was checking the mail and saw the other side of my car :/
It concerns me the most that u were potentially going to eat a day old car sandwich.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
So...I maybe walked across campus last night with my life size Joe Biden cut out.
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
Randomize