So the D.A.R.E. essay I helped my tutor kid write won an award. Oh the irony.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
Just heard the garage door open and I immediately sprinted to the laptop to erase history, even though I haven't watched porn today...I believe Pavlov now.
Seriously. Doesn't matter if I went out last night, work is like crafts class w.a side of facebook
we were all standing in the kitchen taking shots and we look over at you and your face is in the plate of spaghetti you were eating.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
wtf guys I thought we agreed on no more knives. So much for not destroying the house
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
