I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Even my vagina gasped.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You took a bar mat shot.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
He brought a TOOTHBRUSH and TOOTHPASTE with us on our date..... I want to go home and forget I ever decided to be nice and go on this date in the first place...... A TOOTHBRUSH!?!?!
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
My cat is sitting in the window watching the neighbor's dogs doing it. I think she's lonely too.
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