what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
the next time i see a chick with leggings under her jean skirt...i'm gona beat her ass with a fashion magazine...
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
Mario Lopez is the poor mans Ryan Seacrest
He yelled IN THE FACE!! while cumming on my face.
Just wandered into a surprise final. Only a surprise for me though. I wish I could say this is the first time this has happened.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Very interesting. Let's just say I got home last night and threw up, found a joint in my bra, and woke up naked in my bed
Randomize
