Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
He told me that before I went to bed I needed to do my stretches and then processed to demonstrate a squat thrust, while completely naked.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
I have a bottle of rum in my pocket...what does that say about me...
You come prepared
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
