You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
do you think there was ever a doctor who smelled his finger after giving a prostate exam?
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
How come the only thing we can do right in our lives is drugs?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Dude this breakup has officially hit rock bottom. sitting around watching women's NCAA basketball instead of going out
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
My friend wants your phone number so you can teach her how to take a beer bong. She saw you doing them last night and got jealous.
Just tell her to open her throat. I don't want to talk to anyone who is jealous of someone who woke up this morning with a cat in their shirt as a result of that glorious beer bonging skill.
My doctor wrote down abstinence as my form of birth control. #ihavenodatinglife
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
should i feel bad about fucking you on my front lawn the day before you set me up with your best friend?
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
I just sharted for the first time in my life. Age 33. Lying in bed. Sober. 2021 is off to a great start!
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