Bristol Palin says: Remember to use protection
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I never appreciated sexting until I went to rehab
1st rule of birth control pills: do not stop taking birth control pills. 2nd rule of birth control pills: do NOT STOP taking birth control pills.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
I left myself a note saying 'buy a hamster but not an orange one like this pen'
omg so drunk
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i have to vacuum my washing machine now, asshole
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
You were so drunk Last night you asked for your glasses so you could read the directions on a band aid
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