sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
shes the kind of girl i dont like to talk to unless my penis is in her mouth.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Woman at starbucks on her computer with a garbage bag of popcorn and a bottle of lotion. Where are you coming from?!
Got stiff armed by the garbage man on the back of the truck...I just wanted to ride one block dude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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