do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I wish there was a Glade Plug-in for vaginas
Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
