Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
He wants Portugal to lose so badly he threw out all the sangria. You know how depressing it is to watch someone dump 4 gallons of heaven?
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
Just because you have put things in my vagina does not mean you know me
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
He howled at the moon then told me that if i were a dog he'd have sex with me...either i look like that girl or i need to stop going on blind dates. Period.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
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