You know if a vagina was a face, it'd be ugly as hell...
you just love her because she lets you bang her with fruits and veggies!
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
its time for step 4 of getting over him: post his number on the transvestite page on craigs list asking for pics
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
I think it may be easier if I stay drunk/high til the wedding. You game?
she is currently in the shower drinking a beer and dancing to a song called "the penis song" my roommate is cooler than yours
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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