I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Its like I instantly had a mental image of me in my mugshot.
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
He gave me an elaborately handwritten invite (on a bar coaster) back to his place and whispered in my ear 'i have ping pong'. And he said byob. fuck THAT.
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
When did angry sex become our thing?
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Double dirt bag award winner tonight. He picked me up in his wife's car.
He tried to eat me out...through my pants.
Randomize
