sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
The entire defensive line took care if me when I passed out. One of them even held my hair when I puked and the other carried me upstairs to bed. God I love football so much more now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
ok is that genuinely the first four bars of mozart's symphony #40 sharpied onto my arm or
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Just showed my drunk fiancé where I got circumcised, she's been crying for twenty minutes.
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
Randomize