I just saw my grandmother naked. again. this needs to stop now.
I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
If I'm gonna go to jail I'm gonna be wearing a poncho
ok, my life is complete.... the cops AND the paramedic just made a Mean Girls reference...
I think the multiple Sunday morning sirens outside my window are a plot by the cops to get back at me for the shit we pulled last night. Or I should move to a better area.
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
As a heterosexual male nursing student, the odds are ever in my favor. My first semester has basically been The Horny Games. I've killed almost all of the competitors at this point.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
Randomize
