the ice cream truck is coming omgomg
dude, it's 2 am.
but its COMING
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
3 things. 1) we need alcohol 2) we need alcohol 3) we need tortilla chips. Let's make a plan. Bro shakes and salsa.
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wish they could condense everything I needed, nutritionally speaking, into mike and ikes
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
Randomize