If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
I have the Everlasting Gobstopper of boners right now. It's kinda like a gift from god, but I don't want to spend anymore time with this girl than I have to.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
wanna see your best friend chug a bottle of steak sauce?
please go to sleep
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
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