One girl and one boy is just not enough.
Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
Yeah he's definitely gonna feel that one when he wakes up. I beat the shit out of him with that broom handle.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Second wind. Either that or my heart is about to explode. I'm hoping the first one.
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
From now on, you must never doubt my ability to go from drunken rambling lovesick girl to Stepford wife within the course of a few hours.
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
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