This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
Feel like bed is flying. Not sure where we're going. Hope there is candy.
so i had a dream that andrew cuomo ate me out. guess who i'm voting for?
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I miss her, but also fucked her ex boyfriend.... So there's that
Yeah you burned that bridge with your vagina
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
If he didn’t pick us up we would have been jerkwards eating sad pancakes at a Denny’s.
Randomize
