yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
i just heard Winston Churchill in auto-tune. thank you nerds.
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
Remember when I peed in the trash can in the ATM room last night?
Never thought I'd say this, but thank god for my blackouts.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
Just used a NyQuil cup to take a shot. This night is headed nowhere good.
Randomize
