i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
After throwing up in a tequila bottle on my nightstand (still not sure how she did that) she asked if she could slip into something more comfortable.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Note to self: do not ride giant beanbag chair down stairs.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I mean, it's just pathetic when the standard is tinder and he can't live up to it.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
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