dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
They should really pass out barf bags in church
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
For some reason, my father is not responding to the 5 texts I sent him that all read: "Dad dad dad dad dad dddaadd dddddaaaaaaaaad dad".
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
Fairly certain I called dibs on your lesbian virginity last night
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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