So, I'm pretty sure I just jacked off and my gf 17 m/o son caught me. IDK how long he was standing in the crib, but he definately saw the grand finale.
hot ketchup is not a substitute for marinara
I'm watching a Sinbad stand up special. Not even drugs can make this funny.
its like she was born with a silver dick in her mouth
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Being high is an amazing excuse. I was using him for the potential of a beret, come on. I'd do that sober.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
On her way to bed she said, "If you have sex on the couch, just move my blanket" Needles to say, we moved the blanket
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
so i fell out of a tree on the ave last night. someone told me there was alcohol at the top. bastards.
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Randomize