How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
WIFE SWAP. FAMILY OF MIDGETS. LIFETIME. NOW.
about to try to wax my asshole... wish me luck
I left a cheeto on everyone's car trailing to the house i'm at, hanzel and gretel style.
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
My New Years Resolution is to come up with a new resolution monthly. January: decrease my shotgunning consumption speed to 7 seconds or less.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Feel like I died but someone put me In a human microwave and I got back to life.
Plus now I feel weird sleeping with you. It's like shooting a three legged deer. It's already at a disadvantage and couldn't get what it's full potential deserves.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Randomize
