someone, somewhere in austin has to have a muppet
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
If her picture on my phone wasn't mostly of her breasts, I'd never pick up the phone when she calls.
Do you think the party boat will still go out if there is a hurricane?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She threw up in the hot tub how's your night
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Of dear god, I've been waiting to have rug burn like this since I got bored of my vibrator 2 months ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The problem with that is that my car has been stolen
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
tinder day one and i already had more guys message me about "the girl with the big tits in my second picture" than about me. MY 17 YEAR OLD SISTER CAN GET LAID WITHOUT EVEN HAVING TO MAKING A PROFILE
to be fair she does have a great rack
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Excuse me. I’m a mature responsible adult.
You got your arm stuck in a vending machine trying to get fruit snacks.
I had a cast on my hand and if I paid for my fruit snacks, I’m getting my fruit snacks.
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