You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
You got called a pussy at a party with a slow cooker, you can't let that shit slide
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
He asked the waiter, at 6:40 am, drunk, if they served alcohol. After he said no, he's like 'well, I guess we can eat then.'
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
My sister gave me satin sheets. We can fuck on satin sheets.
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
Randomize
