Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I think Charlie st. Cloud is the saddest thing I can masturbate to.
There're making snowcones with the leftover vodka from last night. This is not the time to be making up excuses!
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
holy shit the woman im hooking up with is closer to my moms age than my own
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
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