I think your x's eyes are broken his new girl is so hit
i pounded out a 17-yr-old on saturday night
no, that is not a typo
i turned her down on fri night, googled the state consent laws & then caved on saturday
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
I just wanted to hook up with a white guy to prove that i could go back.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
quick, send me a pic of a fat chick eating ice cream in a bikini. no joke, no questions, just do it.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
Randomize
