People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
it's just like freshman year of high school, with more drugs
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
When's a good time to tell your boyfriend you've slept with his ex girlfriend?
But for future reference, it might help your game if you don't tell the girl you're trying to get on your dick that she's "not the worst thing you've ever seen"
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
Randomize
