He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
I accidently shit my pants. So I tried to throw my underwear in their lake, but they floated. So in the middle of the night, I got into the paddle boat and had to throw a rock on top of them so they would sink. Next time, I just won't shit myself.
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
Finally hooked up w/ that yoga instructor chick. Got a little more than I expected. Like a full on bush more than I expected. How do you tell a girl that her bush scares you?
Just tried to dig out holes in my mattress for my boobs so I could be comfortable lying down on my stomach
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
no we just smoked too much weed and listened to the tarzan soundtrack. phil collins is amazing
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Dude I'm drinking alone and watching cartoons. How is it that someone as hot as me is doing this.
You were filing your nipples with a nail file to "make them sharper"
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