whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
So I thought I was doing pretty good and then I sneezed and prematurely ejaculated...
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
I wish his dick was as long as his hair.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
I want him to be my next love. So I'm taking it slow
As in ill only blow him next week
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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