Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
don't go home with that guy from jersey
i know, not worth the blood test
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
She said I walked up to the McDonalds counter and ordered just a cup full of pickles then proceeded to offer some to everyone in the place.
I'm just crazy horny about you
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
Randomize
