before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Tell your boobs to stop staring at me.
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
it's like doing a sit-up... but, you're inside someone
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
if creating a fake 8 year old brother, who lives with me and has had mono for the past month, to explain why I have ignored my group project members is wrong, then I... well then I'm probably going to hell
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Like pizza and mermaids make up about 1/3 of my thoughts on the weekends.
This is why people in Buffalo die of heart attacks. This and wings
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
Randomize