3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
It's gotten to the point where NOT peeing in the sink feels strange and uncomfortable.
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
All I could think when I saw it was, "All right, Vagina, only one of us is getting out of this alive."
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
I just want nice things and good sex
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
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