don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Dude.. You paid a stripper $50 to listen to you cry last night.
i was gonna do a lot worse than just throw cat food on you while you were passed out, but then you sleep vomited and i felt a little bad
For future reference "I'm too drunk to come today" is an acceptable line to get out of work. I love my job
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Your babysitter texted, wants me to pay with weed. I don't know where to get any & don't want to. Will she take cigarettes instead? Or um, cash? Like a person?
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
