Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
I wish i could make my toaster dance like they do in the second ghostbusters. But i dont have ectoplasmic goo. Or a toaster.
wait, do i give off the impression that i DON'T want girls to show me their boobs if i video chat with them?
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO GET MY FUCKING CUPCAKES WHEN THE GROUNDSWORKER I HOOKED UP WITH IS LOITERING IN THE VENDING AREA
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
