The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
You were hopping up and down because you wanted only his strongest sperms to make it to the egg.
Darwin at his finest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
I may have just serenaded the sadface couple sitting on a bench outside the dorm by singing Bye Bye Bye.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
... Cuz there's nothing like having your two male roommates catching you have a good cry in the driveway at 9am on a Wednesday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
...I watched him run on the beach yesterday and I think I started ovulating
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
Randomize