All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
Crap im kindd 0f drunkk we just hooked up in a mcdonalds parking lot but i dont know why how we are here
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
He set an alarm on my phone to an infant screaming and puking to make sure i take my pill. its working.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
Pretty sure I just noped a member of the Canadian women's hockey team on Tinder.
Some Romanian guy at work just told me "you come my house, we drink beer and you come make fuck with my sister"
If he's not there watching you go for it. It's been a while bro.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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