I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
He's almost as awesome as vicodin.
Can i tell him you said that? Cuz i know that means a lot coming from you
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Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I think we should take up crocheing or stamp collecting....something completely lacking penises
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
Was the first guy that bit your neck last night wearing a trenchcoat...I have a vague memory.
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The sad part is I didn't even want to get laid. I just wanted the emotional connection, but my vagina was screaming "TOUCH ME. TOUCH ME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE MY DADDY ISSUES ARE MUCH DEEPER THAN MY EMOTIONAL NEEDS!" Vodka has a way of getting me out of my emotions and gets me fucked every time.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Congratulations on giving me my first and second hickeys last night. I made it almost 30 years without one, but who needs class these days?
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